As a result of the pandemic, her nonprofit organization, Rise Collective, lost a significant amount of funding, which forced her to make a difficult decision. At that moment, her options became 1) to give up what she had spent the last 5+ years building and go into another line of work or 2) to give it all that she had, give up her salary to keep the operations afloat and fight to keep her dream alive. Courtney chose to fight and move forward.
I couldn't shake the feelings of dread. These constant thoughts crowded out any sense of reason. "Do I know God? Does he even want to know me?"
Being a college student working part-time at the local Christian bookstore, I did the only thing I knew to do: I stole a copy of Billy Graham's "Steps to Peace with God" and hid in the bathroom. I thoroughly examined every word of the evangelical tract during my impromptu borderline illegal 15-minute break. I paused to pray, hoping that this time, this prayer would take. But until now, no matter what I did, I couldn't find peace.
"This too shall pass." My mom's coworker gave me that advice during a difficult time during my teenage years. She said it with so much resignation that I had to laugh. I love the phrase, but I have found it not always true. Sometimes the darkness doesn't lift. Faith is not something that comes easily during difficult seasons. It's natural to feel frustrated, confused, and even angry with God when life seems to fall apart. But, as difficult as it may be, leaning into your faith during these times is crucial.
